I begynnelsen var jeg så flink. Ria kom, og jeg brukte pustingen jeg hadde lært på yogaen til den var over. Hva i all verden skal jeg med smertestillende, tenkte jeg, det her går jo fint.
Så kom ei rie til, og ei til, og så kom de tett i tett, som perler på en snor. Yogapusten forsvant som dugg for sola og blei erstatta med "MØØØØØØØØØØ". Jeg tilbragte fødselen med å raute og raute, og så rauta jeg litt til.
Så var ho bare der, den nydelige jenta vår, og tida sto stille.
Når mannen min leser bøker om dyra på bondegården for dattera vår sier han alltid:
"Kua sier MØØØØØ, akkurat som ho mamma."
When I went into labor, I was prepared. I was so sure that I would become a fire-breathing dragon that shouted terrible things to whoever came near me. When the day finally came, and I was so overdue it was possible to be, things worked out in rather different way.
To begin with, I was so good. When the contraction came, I used the breathing-technique I learned in yoga-class until it was over. Why would I need any painkillers, I thought, this is turning out great.
Then I had another contraction, and another, and another, and then they came so quickly, one on top of the other. My yoga-breathing melted away, never to be heard again, and was replaced with: "MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO". I gave birth whilst lowing and lowing, and then I lowed some more.
And then, there she was, our beautiful girl, and time stood still.
When my husband reads books about the animals on the farm, he always tells her:
"The cow says MOOOOO, just like Mom."